Indian Matchmaking show on Netflix reflects how toxic our desi culture is

Gujranwala, Pakistan — Muqadas Ashraf was just 16 when her parents married her off to a Chinese man who had come to Pakistan looking for a bride. Less than five months later, Muqadas is back in her home country, pregnant and seeking a divorce from a husband she says was abusive. She is one of hundreds of poor Christian girls who have been trafficked to China in a market for brides that has swiftly grown in Pakistan since late last year, activists say. Brokers are aggressively seeking out girls for Chinese men, sometimes even cruising outside churches to ask for potential brides. They are being helped by Christian clerics paid to target impoverished parents in their congregation with promises of wealth in exchange for their daughters. Parents receive several thousand dollars and are told that their new sons-in-law are wealthy Christian converts. The grooms turn out to be neither, according to several brides, their parents, an activist, pastors and government officials, all of whom spoke to The Associated Press. Once in China, the girls — most often married against their will — can find themselves isolated in remote rural regions, vulnerable to abuse, unable to communicate and reliant on a translation app even for a glass of water. Augustine accused the Chinese government and its embassy in Pakistan of turning a blind eye to the practice by unquestioningly issuing visas and documents. The Chinese Ministry of Foreign Affairs denied that, saying China has zero tolerance for illegal transnational marriage agencies.

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In Pakistani society, elders of families consider it one of their major responsibilities to get the younger ones married in their lifetimes. Even today, to find the perfect spouse for their child, the parents often prefer looking into the most convenient and trusted option, that is, the children of maternal and paternal aunts and uncles of their children.

If there is no suitable match in the family, the matchmakers are contacted for help. A certain amount is also paid as part of the registration process. Along with that, the list of demands is also noted down.

In some regions, specific professions are associated with matchmaking. For instance, in many parts of North India and Pakistan, the local barber (or nai) was a.

Men in China and Pakistan are trafficking women intended to become brides in a vicious circle of exploitation, a report from the European Foundation for South Asain Studies published on Friday explained. The women, according to the report, instead find themselves forced to marry a man who hides them away from society and subjects them to sexual abuse and forced prostitution. The crime rings are using the good relations between China and Pakistan as a way to set up illegal matchmaking services, attracting Pakistani Christian families with the promise their daughter will be married to a wealthy Chinese Christian man, according to the report.

China began the One-Child policy in in order to curb the growing birth rate. Experts estimate that there are nearly 33 million more men than women because of the preference to have a son during the time the policy was enforced. Because of the policy, 40 to 50 million women are not alive today. The masculine society encouraged abortions of female fetuses, infanticide – the killing of babies – and abandonment of female babies.

Women from Myanmar and Vietnam have also been sold to Chinese men for a number of years. Human Rights Watch reported in April that the Pakistani government must stop the bride trafficking. They said a Pakistani television station was allowed into one of the illegal bridal centers in Lahore where six women were waiting to be moved to China for their weddings. Two of the women were years-old.

The Chinese Embassy in Pakistan responded to the HRW report saying the matchmaking centers were illegal under Chinese law and the government and law enforcement are working with Pakistan to curb the illegal bride trafficking. Two Pakistanis and eight Chinese men were arrested at the center and six Chinese passports were collected.

In marriage market, Pakistani Christian girls lured to China

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Matchmaking and Traditionally Arranged Marriages and Domestic Violence in. Rural Sindh, Pakistan. Ameer Ali Buriro*, Dr. Noraida Endut. Centre for Research​.

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The Leprosy Mission Trust India. Holy matrimony: A peek into the secretive world of matchmaking among the super rich Matchmakers get most of their business through referrals.

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Two weeks ago Netflix debuted Indian Matchmaking , an eight-episode documentary series that follows Sima Taparia a matchmaker from Mumbai on her quest to find the perfect partner for a mix of South Asian people, both in India and in the U. While entertaining in parts, the show proved to be pretty triggering in a lot of ways. As a first-generation Indian girl who grew up in the U. Anaa: Oh my God. All the time, are you kidding me?

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Your email address will not be published. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Breaking news. Property Rates. July 31, Web Desk. The eight-part docuseries features elite Indian matchmaker Sima Taparia as she goes about trying to find suitable matches for her wealthy clients in India and the United States. In the series, she is seen travelling around Delhi, Mumbai and several American cities, meeting prospective brides and grooms to find out what they are looking for in a life partner.

Since its release nearly two weeks back, Indian Matchmaking has raced to the top of the charts for Netflix in India and also become a massive social phenomenon. It also proved to be divisive as many seem to disagree if it is regressive and cringe-worthy or honest and realistic. The misogyny, casteism and colourism on display have caused much outrage, but also inspired many to introspection.

Taparia then goes through her database to pull out a biodata that would make a good fit. Arranged marriages are commonplace in India and even though instances of couples marrying for love are growing, especially in urban areas, ninety percent of all marriages in the country are still arranged. Matchmaking has been the job of family priests, relatives and neighbourhood aunties as parents find a suitable match for their children.

Video: ‘Indian Matchmaking’ depicts problems young adults face in marriage

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Netflix documentary sparks a debate about arranged marriages. Through an ensemble cast of astrologers, face readers, priests, prospective grooms, brides, and parents armed with endless lists of demands on caste, height and skin color, viewers are taken on a voyeuristic tour of the complicated process of matchmaking in India, where 10 million nuptials take place every year.

The controversial series has triggered multiple memes, jokes and criticism on social media. It is also polarizing public opinion among those who prefer love marriages and those who endorse arrangements. In the process, however, the biggest casualty has been nuance, with not even a nod to the golden middle path. When I got married, my husband and I were introduced through senior family members. We dated for six months to test our compatibility before getting married on Feb.

So was ours a love marriage? Or arranged?

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It might seem strange to invoke an Alice Walker essay in connection with the new Netflix reality series, Indian Matchmaking , but, here we go. The essay is revolutionary for that coinage. Walker explicitly draws a connection between skin color and marriage. Walker tells us two smaller, adjoining stories, about herself and a friend in their single days. In the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking , the importance of skin color arrives quickly in talk of matrimony, as do other facets of packaged appearance, the sorts that indicate a notion of a stratified universe: This level of education matches with this one, this shade of skin with this, this height with this, these family values with these, this caste with this, this region with this, and so on.

In the series, she takes on clients in India and America, young desi men and women who seem, for all their desire to get properly paired off, equally conflicted about the whole endeavor.

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To Win This Board Game, Keep Away From The Matchmaker

ISLAMABAD – Pakistani media are reporting that Chinese human traffickers are operating illegal matchmaking centers in Pakistan, where they allegedly trap women from economically burdened families in fake marriages before transporting them and forcing them into prostitution or even selling their organs in China. The revelation prompted the Chinese Embassy in Islamabad to respond Saturday, saying the businesses are strictly prohibited under Chinese law and vowing to crackdown in cooperation with Pakistani authorities on the illegal practice of profiting through cross-border matchmaking.

The Chinese Embassy’s reaction apparently came a day after a top private Pakistani television station aired images Friday of several Chinese men with six local women in different rooms, including two teenage girls, at an illegal matchmaking center in the eastern city of Lahore. When asked, the station said, members of the alleged gang of Chinese human traffickers failed to produce local marriage certificates or documents showing the men had converted to Islam before marrying Pakistani Muslim women, which is mandatory under local laws.

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Is ‘Indian Matchmaking’ realistic? Four UAE couples on how arranged marriages are evolving

Unlike traditional rishta theory and matchmaking, we rely on a cooperative, interactive bond between our representatives and our clients. Initially, the user is requested some details and then assisted by an intelligent facilitator referred to.. Learn More Latest Blog Posts Reasons to Get Married: 8th Aug, am Marriage is a life-long commitment that widens your horizons and the purpose of existence on this earth.

Netflix’s original series, Indian Matchmaking has hit a raw nerve with audiences in India, Pakistan and many in the diaspora of South Asian.

Diaa Hadid. In a wealthy suburb in Karachi, Pakistan’s largest city, a group of young Pakistanis veered between laughter and distress as they played a board game that echoed their lives in both funny and painful ways. The name of the game is Arranged and the goal is to avoid at all costs an arranged marriage — and the matchmaker who sets them up.

She’s known as Rishta Aunty, slang in Urdu and Hindi for a certain kind of middle-aged, busybody matchmaker who knows all the single men and women. To stay out of her grasp in the game, you draw cards that tell you how many spaces to move. It’s a good thing if you get a card that tells you to act scandalously according to the conservative standards of South Asia.

Pakistani Matchmaker/ Marriage Bureau